Ortaya karışık

Boşanmak dünyanın sonu mu?

Paylaşmak güzeldir ;)

 

Yalnızca ülkemizde değil bütün dünyada boşanma oranları gün geçtikçe artıyormuş. Ancak bilmem farkında mıyız ? Bütün dünyada evlenmeme oranları da artıyor. İnsanlar boşanma korkusundan evlenmiyor. Nasıl olsa bitecek düşüncesi evliliği fobiye çeviriyor.

Boşanmaktan neden korkuyoruz?

Çocuklu evliliklerde boşanma konusu ayrı bir konu başlığı olarak ele alınmalı, ancak şunu söylemek gerekiyor ki; sürekli kavga edilen bir evde yetişen çocuklara nazaran, boşanmış ve dengeli bir ilişki yürüten ebeveynlere sahip olan çocuklar çok daha mutlu birer birey olarak yetişiyor. Mutsuz bir evliliği kaderi olarak gören ve hayatını kavga içinde geçiren ebeveynler çocuklarına iyi bir örnek olabilir mi dersiniz?

İmkansız.

Çocuksuz evliliklerin bitmesi ve ötesi…

Arada çocuğun olmadığı evliliklerin bitişinde en büyük korku ‘aileler ne der?’ durumu. Yuvanın yıkılma ihtimali gündeme geldiği anda ailelerin araya girmesi, taraf olması, mal paylaşımı gibi etkenlerle belki de uyum içinde ayrılacak olan çift birden bire düşman oluveriyor.

İdeali, eğer gerçekten evliliğin bitmesi gerektiği konusunda hem fikirsek ve konu her iki taraf için de kapandıysa, evlenirken alınan sorumluluğu yeniden alıp, tüm evlilik bitirme işlemlerini planlayıp, aileler ile o zaman konuşmaktır.

Evlilik iki kişilik bir kurum. Elbette aileler zaman içinde evliliğin belli noktalarına müdahil oluyor ancak evlilik bir başkası öyle istiyor, hayal ediyor diye devam ettirilecek bir kurum değil.

Bitmesine karar verilen evliliğin devamı ancak çiftin kararı ve isteği ile devam edebileceğini aileler de anlamalı ve olgunlukla karşılamalı.

Siz siz olun, ne istediğinizden emin olduğunuzda ailenize, arkadaşlarınıza ve çocuğunuza karşı dik, kararlı ve istikrarlı bir tutum sergileyin.


Paylaşmak güzeldir ;)

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